REPORT: People Still Bitching About The Last Jedi

Rian Johnson’s 2017 film Star Wars was a huge success on almost any metric. The film grossed over 1.3 billion dollars, making it comfortably the highest grossing movie of 2017. The movie was well-received by critics, with a Metacritic rating of 85%, and a Rotten Tomatoes critic rating of 91% (and top critic rating of 94%). General audiences and film-goers also were won over, with the film holding an average rating of 7.2/10 on IMDb and 3.6/5 on Letterboxd. The movie was also nominated for four Academy Awards.

However, despite this, new scientific study results have shown that some people will not stop bitching about this damn movie.

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More than 12 months down the line, fights about this movie reign supreme on every comment thread, every forum, every discussion. It’s an inescapable nightmare of film discussion online.

Interestingly, the film holds an average rating of 7.6 from people under 18 on IMDb (8.0 for females under 18), but just 7.1 from men over 30. That’s just a fun fact.

A mere mention of Star Wars online will doubtlessly bring forth veritable armies of disparagers and defenders out of the woodwork. No comment section is safe from the tidal wave of vitriol, name-calling and heated nonsense.

We talked to renowned social scientist Hayden McGregor about the phenomenon…

“I’m fucking sick of it, to be honest”, he replied when questioned. “Like it or don’t, just shut the fuck up about it. No further questions”.

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Drawing criticism by many for its unique structure, weak subplot elements, and… having women… the film is one of the most widely discussed and debated films of all time.

AND YET, in that time, NOBODY HAS EVER CHANGED THEIR MIND.

SO STOP IT. BOTH OF YOU

Like it, you’re a SJW, hate it, you’re a sexist. Meaningless vapid insults and buzzwords are hurled around by two sides of a stupid, stupid coin.

Sound and fury, signifying nothing.

Nobody cares if you like Star Wars: The Last Jedi or not.

Shut up about it.

Please?

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